Short Note for the Day/Probably Week.

Well my mother was here for a few days and it will take me a few days to overcome this visit as it was the absolute worse visit I can ever remember. I am the daughter from hell but whatever, I somehow have to find the strength to climb out of it and try and live. For the first time in my entire life I expressed my feelings to her and it was not a nice scene. My mother who has lived in denial all her life was a little shocked to hear some of the things I had to say, but what can I say she had taken me to my limit and I could no longer hold back. Apart from that I feel like crawling in a hole and not coming out now; unfortunately I have other commitments that I have to take care of and cannot give into my feelings. So it is one of those times you are constantly crying out to God and yelling HELP ME GET THROUGH THIS MINUTE, THIS HOUR, THIS DAY!!! Just get me through whatever is ahead and there are some things I do have control over, such as who I speak to on the phone, who I connect with over the next few days, if it is not life giving I cannot do it. My focus has to be my family and beyond that I cannot do anything. As crappy as I feel, the heavy load I was carrying has now been lifted. So this is what I have been through over the past few days. It is a beautiful day finally here in Manitoba so I will be doing the threapeutic thing and working in my yard today. It will be very good for me. I was a woken up after going back to bed by one of my boys getting sick, so I quickly got up and changed my bed and started my day. I read a comment from a freind of needing a new blog out so I thought I would quickly get this out and get the next load of laundry out on the line. Okay so to all of you who read this I hope you all have a great week!!! Hold on to the phrase God is Good, and all things work out for good to those who love the Lord. So I holding on by a thread. I need his Grace more than ever at this point of my life, I feel so bad that my give a damn got busted over the pass couple of days. I'm a loser and failure, yet I have to go on. Oh well.....